Let’s be real… “That Girl” aesthetic has been floating around TikTok and Instagram for years now.
She’s the girl with the perfect morning routine, the iced matcha, the chic workout set, and the spotless apartment.
But here’s the truth, becoming your version of That Girl doesn’t mean copying someone else’s highlight reel. It means defining what your dream lifestyle looks like and then taking simple steps to bring it to life before the year ends.
So, this post is not about another “5am routine.” It’s about building a life that actually feels like yours.
Let’s get into it.
Step 1: Define Your Version of That Girl
When I first started building my online life, I had a very generic idea of who “That Girl” was. She was someone I saw on Pinterest boards and TikTok edits — 5am workouts, perfectly matching outfits, and celery juices.
But copying someone else’s idea left me tired and disconnected.
So I had to ask myself, “what do I actually want my life to look like?”
For me, it was being able to shut my laptop in Bali by 2pm, wander to the beach, and still know I had money coming in from my digital offers.
That was my version of her — freedom, softness, and creative work I loved.
For you, That Girl might mean financial independence, moving to a new city, building a wellness routine, or simply feeling less stressed in your day.
So, write it down. The clearer you get, the more real it becomes.
Also, when I was defining my version, a book called Atomic Habits by James Clear gave me a simple framework to take the lifestyle I dreamed about and turn it into small daily steps.
It made me realize that identity always comes first. Once you know who you want to be, habits follow naturally.
Step 2: Romanticize the Boring Stuff
One of the biggest shifts I had to make was realizing that That Girl energy isn’t built on the big, aesthetic moments you see on Instagram. It’s actually about the little things, the ordinary routines that you decide to make intentional.
Back when I was still working as a hotel receptionist, my days felt repetitive and draining.
But I started making small changes.
The first one was buying a journal I genuinely loved and committing to writing in it every morning before work. It didn’t magically change my entire life overnight, but it gave me a sense of calm, control, and joy in the middle of a job I didn’t love.
For you, this might look totally different. Maybe it’s brewing your morning coffee in a mug that feels special instead of grabbing a paper cup on the go. Maybe it’s lighting a candle before you sit down to write, or finally clearing your desk so it feels like a space you want to work in.
The act itself isn’t glamorous, but the meaning you give it is.
When you treat these small habits with intention, they add up. They create an energy that carries into the bigger areas of your life.
Suddenly, you’re not just “getting through the day” — you’re building it into something you actually enjoy.
Step 3: Build Confidence Through Tiny Actions
Here’s something most people won’t tell you, you don’t “become” That Girl by waiting until you feel ready.
Confidence doesn’t arrive in one big moment. It grows in small steps.
When I first started creating content online, I had no clue what I was doing. My first launch completely flopped. My audience was tiny. There were days I felt embarrassed even calling myself a business owner.
But every time I pressed “publish,” even if only three people saw it, I built a little bit more courage.
This is the part that feels uncomfortable — you have to act like your future self before you feel like her.
That might mean creating your first post even if you think no one will care. It could mean putting aside $100 into a “travel fund” even if the dream holiday feels years away. Or maybe it’s finally signing up for the course you keep thinking about, even if part of you tells that you’re not ready.
None of these actions will feel life-changing in the moment.
But together, they build evidence.
They prove to you that you can show up, that you can follow through, that you can trust yourself.
And that’s where real confidence comes from, not from perfection, but from momentum.
Step 4: Create Space for Growth
I’ll be honest, for years I was filling every single minute of my day with work, hustle, and noise.
Becoming That Girl isn’t about doing more; it’s about creating room for better things to land.
That means slowing down enough to actually hear your own thoughts. Try journaling before grabbing your phone in the morning. Go for a walk without headphones. Say no to things you secretly resent but have been saying yes to out of guilt.
If you’re feeling stuck or overwhelmed, one of the simplest resets is what I call the vision board refresh.
Sit down with Canva (or even old magazines if you’re into the analog vibe) and create a board for just the next three months. Not ten years from now. Not “someday.” Just the immediate season ahead.
Put on it the income goal that excites you, a few places you’d love to go, daily habits you want to build, and even small luxuries you want to normalize in your life.
Don’t overthink it, this isn’t about perfection, it’s about direction.
That one exercise can shift your energy from scattered to focused. Because once you see your dream life in front of you, you can start acting like the person who’s already living it.
Step 5: Surround Yourself With the Right Energy
You can’t become That Girl if you’re surrounded by people who roll their eyes at her.
When I left my receptionist job and booked my one-way ticket to Bali, most people thought I was insane. They couldn’t see what I saw, the possibility of building a calm, soft, freedom-filled business.
If I had only listened to their doubts, I never would’ve made it.
What kept me going was community. Not the one around me in real life at the time, but the one I built online — women who wanted the same things I did: slow mornings, income from creativity, and the freedom to design their lives differently.
That’s the kind of energy you need if you’re going to grow.
Take a look at your circle. Who’s genuinely rooting for you? Who challenges you to step into your next level? And just as important, who leaves you drained after every interaction?
If you don’t have “your people” yet, don’t panic. You can find them online. Follow accounts that inspire you, join email lists that speak your language, or start creating content of your own and let your community build itself around your message.
The truth is, becoming That Girl doesn’t happen in isolation. The right energy multiplies your progress — the wrong energy keeps you stuck.
Choose wisely.
Final Thoughts
Becoming That Girl before the end of the year isn’t about chasing perfection. It’s about asking what would my ideal self do today?
And then doing one small thing in her direction.
By the time January rolls around, you’ll look back and realize you’ve already started living her life.
And if you want extra support, inside my free email Diaries, I share the behind-the-scenes of how I built my own version of That Girl — from a hotel receptionist in night shifts to building my soft digital empire between Bali and Europe.
You’ll also get my free Canva vision board template as a bonus so you can start designing your version today.
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